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Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Venting

I have made every provision to make sure my kids are taken care of and have the support they need while I'm dealing with my health, but people don't understand that I have no one taking care of me when I get home. No one to lay on, cry on, cuddle with, throw up with, get warm with, ache with, scream and let my frustrations out with. No one taking care of my emotional, mental and physical needs. Its okay to get an occasional phone call, text, or check in but their not frequent enough to cover having someone in your presence. Hell I hardly hear from the people I call my friends and claim they love me during all this. Their lives are too busy, yet I'm ALWAYS there for everyone else.  It's not about wanting a mate. It's not about needing a mate. It's about missing, wanting and needing that One mate that will be my rock and support me while I'm in need and even when I'm not.  It's not easy coming home sick everyday, tired and taking care of everyone else and no one here to take care of me. If you can't understand that, it's because you haven't gone through this alone. If you think I'm whining, needy, or bitchin all the time, then go through what I am, AFTER you delete me, and then tell the world you understand. Don't judge me, because I realize I can't do this alone, no matter how strong and independent I've been all my life. It's okay for me to want someone by my side to make life a little bit easier. Now I have much respect for my mom caring for my dad all these years. He is.blessed to have her there by his side.  God made a woman to be by her mates side as he provides for her. I'm Gods creation. Did you forget you are too? Have a great day people!

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