Friday, June 28, 2013

Secret Rendezvous

Secret Rendezvous

Secret rendezvous
Wanting to be near you
Missing your smile
And the way you make me feel

The chemistry between us is
Noticeable by everyone
Even those that have their eyes shut
To what we have going on between us

Welcoming the moments
That we will see each other again
In hiding
But open to exploring each other
In every way imaginable
Not willing to let go
Of this fire between us

Looking into your eyes
I see you’re hard for me
Longing to be inside me
Touching me
Holding me
Claiming me as yours
Even though I’m not
You want it just the same

You’re someone else’s
But you are wanting me
All the time
Sensing my presence
No matter how far away I am

I captivate you
And you drive me insane
With lustful desires
And heartfelt connections
Seizing every moment
To connect with you

Unwilling partners
Can clearly see
But try to deny
What’s between you and me
It’s clear
You and I
But walls can’t stop us
Or even try to keep us apart
What we have together
Is fun, fresh and open from the start

More than just a physical attraction
It’s more
It’s a bond
It’s a link between two different
Types of people
Joined by a mutual
Attraction to each other

We videotape our
Fuck session
Watching it over and over again
When we are apart
Fascinated by all the
Things we try together
Not new
But made alive with each stroke
And touch

Yet planned out
Always exciting
Yet scandalous
It can’t be denied
Even if we tried

You want it
I need it
I’m ready for our
Secret rendezvous
Just between us two
Or maybe three
With no limits
Or stress
Just us
In our oasis of bliss
You and I
On our secret rendezvous



At the point we are at
Loving each other
Wanting more
But can’t seem to get it right

That we have allowed
Outside forces
To lead us astray
Giving our love away
To people who can’t
Love like we love each other

Why we can’t seem to come together
When our hearts have been linked
For what seems like forever
Taunting us but not giving way
To the love we know we both
Have for one another
Yet we keep leaving astray

That you don’t see
The love I’ve always had for you
And can’t compare to any other
Missing that look in your eyes
That told me that I had your heart
Not remembering the last time
I felt you completely in love with me
Out of fear that I can’t love you
Or be what you need to be
If only you knew how ready
I am and willing to be so

That I can’t find
My happiness
In your arms
And wake up to a love so
Beautiful and forever new
Wanting more
But can’t seem to make you see
That you are the only one
For me
Needing to make you
See me for me
And not for what I used to be

That you will never see
Just how much you mean to me
Always here in the shadows
Praying and waiting for you
Trying not to let go
But unsure if I should hold on too

That I can’t seem to find
The right words to say
Or do what needs to be done
To make this right
To correct all that went wrong
If only I could go back in time
Even a year ago
Maybe even two
And do it all over again
While im running around in circles
Losing sleep
Over the state we are in right now

Because I can’t seem to catch your attention
And make you understand
Just how much you and I
Mean to me
So I run away
to find some sort of comfort
Never fully finding peace
Because my peace resides in your
Arms and within your heart

That my heart is aching
For a love that seems to be out of reach
But yet so close
I can smell your cologne
And the scent of your lips
Close to mine
Engulfing me
Entrancing me with each touch

For some kind of relief
From this pain
I can’t do anything
But call love
Because in this wish
I see you
My definition of love
My dream come true
My everything
I ever wanted
But could not seem to have

That the pain I caused you
You can’t forgive
And yet I have forgiven
Every hurt you caused me
Because that is what I believe
Love is all about
Moving forward

For the day
When I can say that this pain is gone
Either because
You’re with me finally
Or because
I can no longer
Wait for something
That may never be


Wednesday, June 26, 2013

My Purpose in Life

As my life was instantly
Upon me
I saw your faces and knew instantly
What my purpose was
For living
Seeing your beautiful faces
Smiling at me
Telling me you love me
Calling me mommy
Loving me unconditionally

In this life I have been given the gift
Of being a mother
To two precious children
Who adore me
And love me without doubt or fear
Counting on me to nurture
And provide for them
Supporting them when others may not

And in this life
I have the joy of waking up every morning
To see your sleepy faces
And kissing you at night
To watch you dream sweet dreams
All my life
I dreamed and prayed for you
But never did I imagine
I would have such blessings
Wrapped in two small gifts
Personally delivered and blessed by God

In my life
I have been given one mission
I know without doubt I can achieve
And that is being the best mother I can be
To the two most precious people in my lives
My daughter and angel Hevyn
And my doting and affectionate Devyn

You are my life
And I love you
With every breath I take
And with each beat of my heart
This life would be nothing
Without the two of you
I love you
Your mommy
Your friend
Your biggest fan
For a lifetime

© copyright 2013-06-26 19:41:49 - All Rights Reserved

In this Moment

In that moment
When I could see my life rush past me
I thought of you
And how you make me feel
And smiled at the fact that I had been running from you
Trying to safeguard my heart
When you had been there protecting it
All this time
Trying to show me
What you can and will be to me
…If I just let you

In that moment
When I was trapped
I instantly thought of you
And what I would be leaving behind
If I couldn’t get free
And it brought tears to my eyes
To know I might not ever
Experience all you had to offer me

In that moment
I could clearly see you laughing, joking
And doing that thing you do
That annoys me
And it made me smile

Even in that moment
I was comforted by the thought of you
And was relieved to know that
When I emerged I could run right into your arms
Safe and secure
Unscathed and untouched
Free to surrender completely
To being loved by you

In that moment
I realized what was important
Knowing who holds me dear
And not just who needs me there
But wants me there

In that moment
I learned that I don’t just want you
I need you too
To be the person you keep trying to show me
But I kept running away from
Out of fear
But it was fear that brought me to
This moment
Where I realize that you are what I need
And want

In this moment
I am falling for you
And so glad to have you here in my life
Wanting and needing me too
In this very moment

© copyright 2013-06-26 19:23:03 - All Rights Reserved

In A Flash

My life flashed before me
And all I could see was your face smiling
And full of love for me
You were extending your hand
Asking me to stay
And I willingly came forth to embrace you

In that flash I could see all the mistakes
All the regrets and I couldn’t help
But wonder how long I would miss you
If suddenly I had to leave you

And in that flash
I couldn’t imagine a life without you
Welcoming me home
Kissing my lips
Spending every moment with you

In that flash
I could see us happy and living in peace
And a part of me prayed
that even without the light
I could still see you in my future
Holding me close
Calling my name
Wanting me there with you

In the brightness
I saw a future so aglow
Filled with happiness and joy
Seeing my babies growing up
And growing old with you

In that flash
I erased all the pain
And forgive all my hurts
And let go of all the pains that comes with love

In that flash
I could appreciate life
And all that it entails

I was in darkness
But now the light has shined
It radiated on my heart
And led me straight to you

In that flash
Was an instant of despair
Followed by fear
Of never seeing you again
But as I opened my eyes to the glow
Of your essence
I realized that in that flash
I fell in love with you
All over again

© copyright 2013-06-26 19:05:20 - All Rights Reserved

Monday, June 17, 2013


In my sleep I can feel you looking at me
Watching me breath
Counting the freckles on my face
Twirling my curls between your fingers

When I wake I can feel you close to me
Watching my every move
Smiling at the way I walk about
Making me blush as I catch you staring lovingly at me

As my day goes on I can sense you all around me
Protecting, sheltering me from harm
Peeking to make sure I'm smiling
Doing things to give me reason to think of you

Returning home I can hear you say my name
Telling me you miss me and love me
But then when I look around your not there
I'm hearing things but smiling anyway at the memory of you

I lay down in the warm water
To wash away my day
Feeling you behind me playing in my hair
Washing my stresses away with your gentle touch
Whispering in my ear that you will always be here

I glance in the mirror
And in my reflection
I can see your chest rise
As you lick your lips letting me know you long for me as I crave for you

I touch myself as I lay down to dry off
Feeling the wetness you inspired
As I can feel your full lips
On the back of my neck and your soft hands between my thighs
Claiming me
Not allowing me to want anyone else but you

As I please myself with not one finger but two
I can feel your hands all over me
And your mouth tasting every inch of me
Bringing myself to a height that only you can summon

When I awaken from my fantasy
I sit up, chill bumps all over my body

I look around and again your not there
Only in my memory
Your voice fades away
Yet my feelings are intense and unwilling to let go

I can feel an energy outside
As I run to look out the window
And I can see you waving at me
And your smile is so bright I can't help but run out the door
But when I get there I fall down in misery
For your presence is only in my conscious mind
Your promises broken
My heart shattered

Our love only resides within me
And your nowhere to be found but in my heart
Smiling, touching and leaving me
Dreaming and waiting for you

Friday, June 14, 2013


Cuts like a knife and leaves you bleeding inside out
Takes away your dignity and tears you down

Hurts even worse when its from someone you love
That someone you offered the world to
Who won't even walk a mile with you

When you love someone so much
Yet they stopped loving you
Turning to someone else to fill their time and you in their head
While sleeping on the bed you bought
Under the sheets you made love in

That moment when you give your best
And it isnt enough and you can't seem to find your way through their dust
They left behind as they ran in the opposite direction out of fear or so they say

As you pick up the phone to call someone to say I love you
Or just to say I'm thinking of you
And you know they sent you straight to voicemail
Or they give you some bullshit excuse that their phone went dead or "I left my phone in the car!"

When you get the butterflies in your stomach
Because you thought they were on their way
And the clock keeps ticking- tick tock tick tock
As you lie across the bed crying in dismay

As your heart beats to anothers drum
While they sang and dance to the song of the girl next door
That can't even dance to happy feet and can barely hold a note

And what about this
When you look in the mirror and you can see everything they use to admire still looking good
Only to see pics of her new boo who is a You minus one multiplied by zero

When your friends start to invite you to singles events
Or take you off the guest list because your no longer the other half to the hot couple everyone loved to see

When you long to kiss, touch and have them naked against your skin
Only to roll over to an empty bed over and over again
With your phone on vibrate between your thighs
Waiting for them to just cum by

Is when everything you thought you wanted
Is in reach and you can't touch it or get close
Or what you need you can't have
Who you want doesn't either want you, deserve you, know how to treat you or keep you
And what your heart yearns you just can't seem to find or hold onto

Is what makes us insane, cry,jealous, weak, weary and damn near suicidal
If not life threatening
BUT it also makes us wiser, independent, determined and yes even STRONGER

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

When You Look at Me

I can imagine something more
when you look at me
It makes me melt
And want to let my guard down

I can see something promising
When you look at me
Seeing the future through your eyes
Knowing you want me there

I can feel something real
When you look at me
Its genuine, positive
And it radiates straight to my heart

I can feel special and appreciated
When you look at me
Because your words and actions match
Giving me reasons to believe in you

I can feel myself blushing
When you look at me
Because I see and feel you want me
And its not about sex
Its much deeper than that

I can sense that you love me
when you look at me
Even though its too soon
I know that its more than just like
Its remarkable and cool

I can feel my walls coming down
When you look at me
tearing them down one by one
As you assure me I'm worth the wait

I can feel my tension subsiding
When you look at me
Because I feel safe with you
And believe you will protect me too

I can have all my questions answered
When you look at me
Refecting all I need to know
Giving me no reason to have doubts

I can see myself giving you all my time
When you look at me
As your expressions say you miss me
And I find myself missing you too

I can be myself with you
When you look at me
Because you accept me for who I am
And don't want me to change, not even for you

I can feel myself wanting to give in
When you look at me
Because the intensity in your eyes
Melts my insecurities away...almost completely

I can begin to trust you
When you look at me
Because in your eyes I am already yours
And your priority is to make me smile

I can see myself with you
When I look at my reflection staring back at me
Because I know my needs
And know that above the rest
You are standing up to my test

When you look at me
I smile inside knowing your
Who you are and I can be who I am
And its okay to be scared
As long as your there
Wanting and waiting patiently
For me as you look at me

Sunday, June 9, 2013


In my dreams I can see us in love and living in peace 
But when I awaken to reality I see loss and mistrust

In my hopes I can see a future with you and I
But when the hopes start to fade and fear sets in I only see pain

I realize in my heart you are the One
But in my mind I can't grasp that possibility
Because the past is still present
fueling all the drama that keeps our worlds separate

We may visit Love and Forever but Faith can't stay
Because doubt has crept in and laid rest with Dismay

In a perfect world I can see just you and I
happy and living together as one
In a colorful mirage of something called trust
however guilt and regret can’t leave without prey
as it takes away something that we will need everyday

A commitment to love each other despite how everyone feels
and a loyalty to know that we can withstand what trials we may find

In my dreams I can see just you and I
Happy, together and living our lives
Raising our family and growing together

Then reality wakes me up and I'm dreaming alone
Sitting their old without you by side
Because somewhere along the way we lost a few key pieces
That kept us together for all the right reasons
Respect. Loyalty and a Bond like no other.
A cherished friendship that was beyond any other

Broken and abused, torn and broke down
Stomped on and crushed
left lost and not yet found.

For all I know my dream was a nightmare
And what I thought we had was never ever really there
Yet I refuse to believe that dreams don't come true
Because if that was the case
I would have never fallen in love with you

So I'll dream until I wake to find you by my side
for one thing I know my heart is not blind
To the colors of the path that leaves to Destiny and Fate
When I looked in your eyes and our love could not wait.

Sunday, June 2, 2013

Next Lifetime

Maybe we will pass each other again
At a crossroads
Where we are both waiting
for something beautiful to happen
Like it did once before
Just like you and me

Maybe next lifetime
You will be made for only me
Want only me
Have time to explore all that could possibly be

Maybe when our paths cross
we will be on the same track
Leading to the same place
Keeping up with each others pace

Maybe when me meet
Sparks will fly
And butterflies will flutter
And fireworks will explode like our attraction to one another

Maybe next lifetime
We will come back as lovebirds
Singing a sweet melody  that everyone will enjoy

Maybe when we lock eyes
For the first time
You will see right to my heart
And want to never leave my side

Maybe in our next lifetime
You will open your eyes and see
That you were born for just me
And we are destined- you and me

Maybe when we fall again
You will settle down
And make me a priority
Instead of wasting this lifetime
Running from what could have been
And realize what I did back then
maybe your next lifetime