So two people encouraged me to reach out to my ex fiancee and tell him what is going on with me, healthwise and against my better judgement, because I know how he is, I did.
He hasn't responded, he is sending my calls straight to voicemail and straight ignoring me which I already knew he would do.
I don't know why I put myself through the rejection all over again especially at a time like this.
People aren't like me. Even when I am angry, sad, disappointed, or "done" with a person I always have an open door when they are in trouble, hurting, or need someone to talk to, even when others say I shouldn't. I'm not gullible, I just have a good heart. It has been a weapon of misery but it has also been one of the reasons why people have been in my life for so long and respect me as a friend and person.
Not everyone is like me. So why is it that I am the one that always get someone's ass to kiss when I need their support the most?
O well..."never again" I say to myself...but I know that's not true. I'm too loving and too forgiving to just turn someone away who truly is reaching out.